懂。爱

当真正爱上一个人的时候，心会是满满的，因为你会觉得你爱着的那个人一直都在你心里，即使距离很遥远，但感觉会是满满的。如果心中是没有爱的,只会等别人来爱自己，却不懂得爱人，即使爱的人离自己很近，依然觉得空虚的。

泪水的防线

很努力的 在你面前
掩饰对你的温柔
掩饰心痛的表情
掩饰泛滥的泪水
一切只不过都是在掩饰
到底要掩饰到什么时候？
对你的关心
对你的在乎
已超越了我的防线
很想上前去
亲吻你的脸颊
闻那熟悉的香

我恳求上天
赐我一次爱你的机会
因为我再也掩饰不到
我自己
或许我该勇敢面对
流言蜚语
或许我该诚实表达
爱你的誓言
或许我该坦然承认
对你的感觉
或许 或许
再多的或许
只不过再也骗不到自己
我是真的爱你

坠。落

如果有一天我不再流泪
不是我不再思念
而是我已把心给冻结起来
阵阵冷风 吹进我的心扉
刺疼了每一个毛孔
心 在哭了

心灵已支撑不住肉体
只剩下冰冷的躯壳
但起码我已用力的爱过
傻傻的等过
认真的哭过

如果麻醉自己可以让我忘记你
那么我宁愿不再醒过来
至少在坠下的那一刻
拥有你已经是永恒

在另一个没有悲伤的国度里

寂

终究有一天我会静静的躺下，
遍体是伤，隐隐作痛
最痛的是内心深处那道被隐藏了的伤口
凌乱的发丝，苍伤的面孔
是心碎的痕迹

把自己卷进被单里
用力的张开 惺忪的眼睛
看着窗外的蓝蓝天空
微微投射的光芒
想使劲地飞向云层里去
渐渐的再也看不见
自己的背影

说好的幸福呢？

爱一个人真的会痛的。这是六年后第一次这么痛。
是不是痛久了就麻木了？我真希望它快点麻木，至少没知觉了，就不会感到痛了。
碎掉的心粘回去了始终还有裂痕，虽然不明显，但是它是存在着的。
最后剩下自己一个人或许是孤独的，但是都不比沉溺在痛苦中来得难受。

我一直认为幸福是很简单的，为什么就不能让我幸福一次？
兜兜转转，原来自己想要的幸福其实是很简单而已。
想要有个人关心我，疼爱我，呵护我，捧我在手心，那不就是幸福了吗？
是我一直拒绝让自己幸福了。。。
现在，我只想捉住上天赐给我的幸福，不会让它再次从我的指缝中溜走。

so called life?

This period that i have been went through is so called life?the sadness is at maximum and can imagina how tough i need to be to overcome with all that..sometimes when you think you are the most lucky and happier person in the world,which mean mayb had gained something which everyone wish to have,like relationship,career,family,financial freedom...etc..it's sound like a true perfect life which everyone dream for it...but even though you have gain it you will never expect what will going to happen for the next,either wil keep it on or just lost it in such a moment...whose's knw?it's all depend on "fate"...and no matter good or bad thing happen must hv to accept even mst learn to accept :( cuz i hv no power to change it nor control it..i hv no way to struggle n probe for the truly bad of misfortune that i encountered. .while face and solve is the most simple way..it's jst sound simple yet it's hard whn it cum to real :(
high expectation in self is a gud thg in order to grow further,bt yet sometimes it really need some luck.no doubt i believe in luck so much.this is real happen on me,when i try hard to achieve what i hv dream for so long,bt it's wil never come true,mayb is nt the gud timing?or i hv no luck?i duno...what for i been torturing myself in this short life,and tears non stop T_T
it jst make my life pointless.
quit myself frm the extreme bad working environment is the only way to gain bac my smile n happiness,it's jst a simple decision bt i took so long to made it.i m absolutely nt a gud decisive person,so i been always mess up my life.
learn frm mistake,mayb some frens wil advise me in tis way,or learn to be a decisive person,thgs wil become more easy.ya,i agree wif that..but why i couldn't?
wat's my problem?i hate myself badly T_T
whn everythg seems lk dy settled,bt it doesn't because there is stil important stage after things getting settle, what i need to do is --face with it.
face everythg that i need to face,dun ever think to escape,there is no way for me to escape,wil hv no solution out thr，stand on the origin where problem arises,solve n face wil only do =.=
not jst nid be to tough,bt oso be brave!
u can do it >.<

a little changes ♥♥♥

染了一头黑发，现在又很想念之前的发色了 :(
做人真矛盾！


突然很喜欢之前的发型和发色 :p

到底哪个才适合我呢？
人都是犯贱的，常想要得到得不到的！
但是我内心都明白一个道理，要珍惜眼前拥有的一切。真希望我会深深去体会和做到 :)